Accomodating Autism Late Diagnosis

#ActuallyAutistic. But Desperately Trying to Reach You…

My apologies. I write like a 50s movie voiceover stuck in the wrong century.

But I’m desperately trying to tell you something…

I desperately want to say something important to me.

Honestly… Clearly… Without sounding like a quote-ready Hallmark card… Another cosmic meme…

Or losing you in a fog of metaphor, ambiguity, indirection.


Maybe we do have to play the cards we’re dealt.

Maybe, tho, they change every moment. Discards. Draws. Flipping hidden cards over.

Once in awhile, a brand-new deal.

Maybe, just maybe, we can only choose a new way to play them.

At any moment.

When I sat down to this table, I got a handful of black cards…

Autism. Anxiety. Attention deficits. Depression. Mania. Selective mutism. Delusions. Hallucinations. Psychotic breaks. Shifting personalities. Undependable skills. Undiagnosable illnesses. Catastrophic decisions. Mockery. Ridicule. A family unable to cope. Isolation. Night terrors…

Above all, Loneliness…

But I drew just a few others…

Uneven genius. A compulsion to create. A gift for words. The drive to love…

Tried masking. But that bluff never works.

And Life’s one game I never had the balls to just throw a hand in and wait for the next poker night…

But, late in the game, with a loaned stake from a loving partner who arrived just in the nick of Time…

And just a few weird friends…

I’m working on turning this busted flush into something I can leave this game with.

Not a jackpot.

Just satisfaction.

My apologies. I write like a 50s movie voiceover stuck in the wrong century. (Say, Bladerunner?)

Drama button permanently stuck “ON.”

Note: Thanks to my good, #Neurodivergent friend, Gary Bryers, for the loan of a coupla metaphors…

By johnnyprofane1

Live. Laff. Love. Rebel...

Pretend Rock Star... Cuz it's ALL cosplay.

I have no credentials to offer. At least none that matter anymore to me.

So I offer my life.

It's all I have to give.



#ActuallyAutistic #AllAutistics #AutisticElder #AutisticSurvivor #AutisticJoy #Neurodiverse #Neurodivergent

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